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Showing posts with label Ephesians 5. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Ephesians 5. Show all posts
It was a cold and snowy winter’s night, thirteen years ago, that I wed my best friend. Yes, today (February 23) Andrea and I celebrate thirteen years of Marriage. And at least a few of those days have been filled with wedded bliss.
I married young, just a few days before my 22 birthday. Although I have been married 38% of my life, and have known Andrea for 50%; I must admit, marriage still confounds me. I tell the couples in pre-marital care classes that marriage has to be an institution the came from the mind of God.
For who in their right mind would decide that a man and woman, who came from totally different backgrounds and experiences should come together for life and raise a family. Yes, it does sound a little bit crazy.
In fact, the Apostle Paul thought so to. Listen to how the Apostle Paul describes it in Ephesians 5:32 “This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church.” The Apostle Paul, under the inspiration of the Holy Spirit calls marriage a mystery. ——— But why? Why would he do this?
Because marriage is so much more than two people living together. Instead, it is the joining of two lives into one. But even more amazing than that —> Marriage is an illustration, a living word picture of how Jesus Christ loves His Church! How He Loves You!
It is through this special union of husband and wife that God chooses to reveal Himself to the world. Ephesians 5:32 tells us, that a chief purpose in God creating marriage was to provide a living word picture for all to see His Perfect Love for His Imperfect Bride.
This is a foundational reason why marriage matters. Why, as children of Kings of Kings, we should care, protect, support, and honor marriage. Our own marriage, and the union of others.
As a husband loves his wife with an unconditional, sacrificial, love of action, especially when she may not deserve it. This love points to love much different than most are used to; it displays a love much greater than one is capable of having themselves. This Love points to Christ’s love for us.
As a wife respects and submits to her husband with the same unconditional, sacrificial, love of action, this too illustrates how the Church, the people of God, are to respect and submit to the headship of Christ. — Marriage is not about you or me — like everything else in life. Marriage is all about God, and His rescue, redemption, and restoration of people everywhere.
Jesus said in John 13:5 “By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.” I John 4:19 says “We love because he first loved us.” This type of love and respect husbands and wives are to have for one another — can never flow from within their own spirits. Rather, it must flow from Christ’s; from His love given to us. From a daily bathing in His grace, mercy, gospel, and love.
And as His Spirit, the Holy Spirit, applies this great love to our hearts, he enables us to extend it to others — even our spouse. As we do, the world watches and in a tangible way sees true love, God’s love for them. Marriage by a mystery, but one that points to something much greater than ourselves — the love of Christ.
Yet, marriage not only teaches the outside world Christ’s love; our own marriage teaches us. This is what God has gracious done in my life over the last 13 years. He has used our marriage to draw myself and Andrea into a deeper understanding and appreciation of Christ’s Love and Sacrifice, as well as my sinfulness and redemption.
I realize that I have only begun to mine depth of the wisdom found in marriage that many of you carry — but would like to sharing few things God has taught me through my marriage.
In my marriage I have learned… the depth of God’s forgiveness. Daily I see Andrea extending me forgiveness, when I do hurtful things or stupid things to her. Even when I do the same things to her over again, she forgives me. I don’t deserve it; but she does it anyway. How I daily need to extend her forgiveness; even when she does hurtful, stupid, same things to me. I forgive her. She doesn’t deserve it; but I need to do it anyway.
This regular pattern reminds and teaches me about Christ’s forgiveness. How He forgives willingly all the hurtful and stupid things I do time and time again. How I never deserve it —> but He does it anyway; and how His forgiveness is far sweeter then anything on earth.
In my marriage I have learned… the wideness of God’s Grace. Daily I see Andrea extending me grace when I am crabby, stressed, or in a bad mood. How she chooses to look at the positive side of things, extending me love and understanding; even when my action and attitudes don’t deserve it. It has shown me how I need to treat her the same way.
This too has taught me how wide God’s Grace is; for there is nothing too large it can’t cover, nothing I have done that He will not forgive; even if I wouldn’t forgive it, He will. It reminds me how I do not deserve anything He has, is, or will do for me.
In my marriage I have learned… the expanse of God’s Love. I have seen Andrea’s love stretch much further than I thought possible; reaching over my sin, selfishness, and stupidity. I have experienced my love for her in the same way; growing, flowing, moving me to do things for her I never would have imagined. This continues to illustrate God Love; a love far greater than I am capable of possessing myself; His love is so great for me, that nothing is too far from its reach.
In my marriage I have learned… the meaning of God’s sacrifice. For 13 years I have seen Andrea give up her needs and desires for mine; and I have been stretched to do the same. Fighting against my selfish desires, thoughts, speech, and deeds; giving up the me - for the we. In this, I have grown in understand of how amazing Christ’s sacrifice is. How much it cost Him; and how much I need it.
Finally, In my marriage I have learned… I can’t do it with out Jesus. I find it hard to forgive at times; but Jesus always forgive me. He helps me to forgive, and He forgives through me. I can’t love my wife all the time, and she can’t love me always either. But Jesus always loves me. He gives me the capacity to love, and He loves my wife through me. I do not always want to sacrifice for Andrea; but Jesus has sacrificed everything for me. He compels and empowers me to do the same.
I can’t do it without Jesus —> But with Him all things are possible. Even being married to me. Through this imperfect relationship called Marriage - His Love, Grace, and Sacrifice are on display for all to see.
May your marriage draw you into a closer, more intimate relationship with Christ, and a deeper understanding of his love and grace.
Labels: 1 John 4:19, Christ, Church, Crossed Love, Ephesians 5, Forgiveness, Gospel, Grace, John 13:5, Lessons, Lessons form Marriage, Life Lessons, Love, Marriage
I’m not sure why, but my family hasn’t had the best luck when it comes to vacations. One year we rented a cabin on a lake; and it rained all week. Or the year we drove for hours to reach our hotel only to find they were overbooked and the spacious room we reserved was not available; and were forced to stay in a much smaller room and had to move into another the next morning. Wouldn’t you know it, this year our streak continued. No, it didn’t rain; and our room was nearly perfect, but it was bitterly cold.
I know, what can you expect when you vacation in Minnesota during the month of January, right? However, after a season of warmer than average temperatures we hoped for more. Instead, we were greeted with one of the coldest weeks of the year.
One morning, as we were preparing to leave for a day of activities, I headed out early to warm up our van. I even pulled it up to the front door of the hotel lobby so my family didn’t have to walk in the bitterly cold wind. As I sat there, shivering from the cold I thought to myself; “Now this is Ephesians Five Love,” self-sacrifice love. Not only was I braving the cold, sacrificing my warmth for theirs, but I did this while fighting a head cold and sore throat; I was convinced I deserved “Husband of the Year”!
What is Ephesians Five Love you ask? Loving your spouse as Christ loves the church. Ephesians 5:25-27 reads: “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the Word, and to present her to Himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless.”
Yes, Ephesians Five Love is a “Christlike” love. A love of sacrifice. A love of action. A love expressed unconditionally without exception or expectation of something in return. I was confident my love fitted within those criteria. But, was I really loving my wife just as Christ loved the church? The more I attempted to compare my love, my sacrifice, and my actions to Christ; I realized I wasn’t even in the same league.
Christ sacrificed more by leaving the glories of heaven for the dullness of earth. He became human, and faced every temptation, struggle, and hardship we do; yet He never sinned. If that wasn’t enough, Christ willingly went to the cross, making the ultimate sacrifice: giving His life for ours. What makes this even more amazing is that He did this all for us while we were His enemies. “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” Romans 5:8.
Christ’s sacrifice cost him exceedingly more than mine and offered something far better than a warm car. It paid for our sin, satisfying the wrath of God, restoring our broken relationship, and opening the gates of heaven. All done while we were hostile to Him.
No, my gesture of love doesn’t compare to that of Christ’s; for showing Christlike love to your spouse means loving them when they are unlovable, serving them when it’s undesirable, and sacrificing everything for them regardless of how they act.
Hard? Yes. Impossible? No. However, we are only able to love like Christ if we have experienced Christ’s love. “We love because he first loved us.” 1 John 4:19. Because of Christ’s love and sacrifice for me, I am able to love Him and my wife. May you experience Christ’s Love in your life, so you can extend it to others around you.
Labels: 1 John 4:19, Christ, Christlike, Church, Cold, Devotions, Ephesians 5, Ephesians 5:25-27, God, Husband, Jesus, Jesus Paid it All, Love, Restoring, Romans 5:8, Sacrifice, Sin, Vacation, Valentine's Day, Wife
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